Embarrassed By Grief?

The discomfort that comes with crying in front of others, even during moments that clearly call for tears, often isn't about the emotion itself but about what showing vulnerability has meant in your past relationships. When you feel the need to control or apologize for natural emotional responses, it's worth exploring what old rules about feelings might still be running your reactions.

Today’s Quick Overview:

🌟Self-Worth Spotlight: The "approval addiction audit" that reveals how often you seek external validation before trusting your own judgment...
🗣️ What Your Emotions Are Saying: Why you feel embarrassed when you cry even in appropriate situations and what that reveals about old rules around emotional expression...
📰 Mental Health News: Study finds athlete mental health research overlooks coaches' role, cost-of-living strain weighing on Australians' mental health, and new research on how dreaming strengthens memory...
🙏Daily Practice: Joining a Tuesday evening knitting circle where mistakes can be fixed without starting over...

Let's tune into what voice is speaking loudest in your head right now:

Which inner voice showed up strongest today? The critic pointing out what you didn't finish yesterday? The cheerleader celebrating small progress? The overwhelmed one asking, "How will I get through this?" Thank that voice for trying to help, then ask: what would the wise, patient part of you say right back?

This Week’s Challenge: The "Approval Addiction Audit"

What it is: Track how often you automatically seek other people's approval before making decisions, expressing opinions, or even feeling good about something. Notice how exhausting it is to constantly check if your thoughts, feelings, and choices are "okay" with everyone else. This week, experiment with trusting your own judgment without taking a poll first.

Example scenarios:

Why it works: External validation can become an addiction because it temporarily soothes anxiety, but it also reinforces the belief that your worth depends on other people's approval. Research shows that people with high external validation needs report lower life satisfaction and higher anxiety. When you start making decisions from your own center, you develop genuine self-trust.

Try this: For three days, notice every time you seek approval (asking "does this look okay?", checking for likes, polling opinions). Don't judge it—observe. Then pick one small decision and make it without asking anyone else first. How does it feel to trust yourself?

Reframe this week: Instead of "I need to make sure everyone approves," → "I'm learning to trust my own judgment and be okay with not everyone agreeing."

Celebrate this: Every time you catch yourself seeking approval, you're becoming more aware of your patterns. And every decision you make from your own center, even tiny ones, is practice in believing your perspective matters.

Feeling Embarrassed When You Cry, Even in Appropriate Situations

You're at a funeral, watching a touching movie, or hearing about someone's hardship, and tears start flowing. Instead of just letting the emotion happen, you feel your face getting hot with embarrassment.

You quickly wipe your eyes, apologize, or make a joke to deflect attention. Even though crying makes perfect sense in the moment, you feel exposed and maybe even weak, like you've revealed something you should have kept private.

Instead of judging the embarrassment, ask: What is this feeling trying to tell me about what I learned tears meant?

Hidden Question: "What happens to how people see me if I'm not in control of my emotions?"

Why it Matters: Embarrassment about appropriate crying often isn't about the tears themselves; it's about what we learned tears represented: maybe weakness, burden, or being "too much." When we've internalized messages that emotions should be managed privately, even natural responses can feel like failures of composure.

This embarrassment might be pointing toward old rules about emotional expression that no longer serve you, or a fear that your feelings will make others uncomfortable.

Try This: When you feel that familiar embarrassment about crying in fitting moments, instead of immediately trying to stop or apologize, ask: "What would it mean to let this feeling exist without shame?"

Maybe it's remembering that tears often show you care deeply, that they can actually help others feel permission to be human too, or simply that having feelings isn't something that needs an apology.

Today’s Visualization Journey: Yarn Shop Knitting Circle

Imagine yourself joining a small knitting circle that meets every Tuesday evening in the back room of a cozy yarn shop. Soft skeins in every imaginable color line the walls, and the room holds the gentle clicking of needles and the comfortable murmur of conversation. You're working on a simple scarf, your fingers finding their rhythm as muscle memory takes over.

An experienced knitter sits beside you, occasionally offering a helpful tip when you drop a stitch or need to try a new technique. "Knitting teaches you to fix mistakes without starting over," she says with a smile, showing you how to pick up where you left off. The project grows row by row, each stitch building on the last.

As the evening progresses, you notice how the repetitive motion of knitting creates space for deeper conversation. Stories are shared, advice is offered, and friendships deepen in the gentle rhythm of creating something useful with your own hands.

Make It Yours: What are you building slowly and steadily this week, one small step at a time? How can you be patient with your own learning process, knowing that mistakes can be fixed without starting over?

Today’s Affirmations

Tuesday sometimes brings uncomfortable awareness of how your natural rhythm differs from the people around you. Some days you need more time to process, decide, or complete things. Your pace is information about how you work best, not evidence that something is wrong with you.

Try this: When you notice yourself moving differently than others, remind yourself: "My pace is part of how I do my best work. I can honor this without apology." Give yourself permission to work with your rhythm instead of against it.

Gratitude Spotlight

Today's Invitation: "What's one way your intuition or gut feeling has been helpful recently?"

Why It Matters: Tuesday logic often makes us overthink everything and dismiss our inner wisdom as unreliable or unscientific. But our intuition is constantly processing information and offering guidance that our conscious minds miss. These gut feelings are our accumulated experience and emotional intelligence working together to help us navigate life more effectively.

Try This: Instead of crediting luck or coincidence for that helpful intuition, acknowledge your own inner wisdom. Say to yourself, "I knew what was right." Feel grateful for your ability to sense what you need and for trusting yourself enough to listen to that inner guidance, even when it doesn't come with logical explanations.

Why it matters today: When something doesn't go our way, our minds have a tendency to blow it up into something much bigger than it actually is. One rejection becomes "I'm not good enough," one mistake becomes "I always mess things up," or one setback becomes "this will never work." But most defeats are just data points, not death sentences.

Bring it into your day: Think of something that didn't go well recently. Instead of treating it like proof that you should give up, see it as one attempt that didn't work.

Today, remind yourself that this one thing doesn't define your entire future. You can learn from what happened and try again differently, rather than letting a single defeat convince you to stop trying altogether. Most successful things require multiple attempts—this might just be one step in a longer process.

When Your Family Keeps Asking When You're Going to Have Kids

The Scenario: At every family gathering, someone inevitably brings up your reproductive timeline. They ask questions like "when are you going to give us grandchildren/nieces/nephews?" or make comments about your biological clock, how great you'd be as a parent, or how your cousins already have kids.

Whether you're not ready, can't have children, don't want them, or are dealing with fertility struggles, these questions feel invasive and presumptuous. You want to shut down the topic without sharing deeply personal information or starting family drama.

Try saying this: "That's something [partner's name] and I will figure out privately. I'd love to hear about what's new with you instead - how's [topic you know they care about]?"

Why It Works:

Pro Tip: If they persist with "I'm just curious" or "we just want you to be happy," you can respond: "I know you care about me, and this is something I need to keep private. Tell me about [redirect topic]." Don't feel obligated to explain your reproductive choices or timeline - just keep redirecting until they get the message that this topic is closed.

Your 3-Minute Writing Invitation: "What's a piece of advice I've been giving to others that I could use myself right now?"

Why Today's Prompt Matters: Tuesday offers good energy for noticing the wisdom we share freely with others but struggle to apply to our own lives. Sometimes the guidance we need is already in our own voice.

Permission to Repeat Yourself When People Aren't Listening

You're allowed to say the same thing multiple times when someone keeps asking questions you've already answered or ignoring boundaries you've already stated.

Why it matters: We often feel like we should find new ways to communicate the same message when people don't seem to hear us the first time, but sometimes repetition is exactly what's needed. Some people need to hear something several times before they take it seriously, and that's not your communication failure.

If you need the reminder: You don't have to get more creative or more convincing every time you repeat an important message. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is say exactly the same thing in exactly the same way until it sinks in. Consistency isn't boring, it's clarity.

Tonight's Gentle Review

Invite the day to exhale by asking yourself:

Release Ritual: Take five deep breaths, making each exhale longer than your inhale. With the final breath, let your whole body soften as if you're sinking into something supportive that's been there all along.

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Coming Wednesday: What to say when your partner gets upset every time you spend money on yourself but feels free to buy whatever they want without question.

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*The Daily Wellness shares educational content only and is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice and diagnosis. Please consult a licensed provider for personalized care.